For parents: How do I make sure the service will meet my needs?
Be sure to check the court order to see if it specifies the kind of supervision. Then check with the provider to see that all conditions can be met. Due to the limited resources available in most communities for such services, you will probably have to be flexible. Some services are open for limited times, particularly in smaller communities. Remember, this is about your children-and their needs. It may require some sacrifices on your part.
Parenting is not always convenient, and we need to be sure that we do not let minor inconveniences interfere with our child's right to have time and attention from both parents. If you are the non-custodial parent, your unwillingness to arrange your schedule to fit the times available through the service may be interpreted as a lack of interest by the courts, which can lead to termination of parental contact.
If you are the custodial parent, your inflexibility may be seen as an effort to keep the child from the parent. This has been known to result in reversal of custody. You will probably not have any difficulty, if you can truly think about it from your child's point of view instead of your own.
When we initially make contact, remember that this is all new and perhaps a little uncomfortable to you. I am experienced and will make you as comfortable as I possibly can. I will guide you through the process and do everything I can to assure that your child's needs are met.
Try not to displace your anger against the other parent, the system, or the unfairness of the situation onto them. Monitors are not responsible for the fact that you are being asked to use the service. We are here to help and to do everything we can to make what may be to you a bad situation, as good as possible.
*This portion of information is provided courtesy of the Supervised Visitation Network.